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How to Be More Likable: 10 Things to Do Today

G.L. Hoffman

#1 No Left Turns

Years ago, someone wrote about his 90-year-old parents’ Secret to a Long Life. He thought they would reveal the “secret” as eating right, exercise and wine with dinner. But their answer? “No left turns,” said the old man.

When he asked “why left turns?” his parents said they read more elderly people die from car accidents than heart attacks. Old people often turn in front of oncoming traffic and with their deteriorating depth perception, accidents happen. So, they resolved to never make left turns again. They make three right turns to get them going the right way. Some days, they would lose count and have to make seven right turns. If they lost track again, they just went home, they said. After all, they reasoned, there wasn’t that big of a rush to get there anyway.

Such a simple solution to a big problem: No left turns.

Same thing with how to make yourself more likable. There is one simple thing, every likable person has—a positive attitude. But we all have positive attitudes; especially during good times. It is easy to have a positive attitude then.

What’s more differentiating and difficult is how to have a positive, optimistic attitude when things are not going so well. If you can conjure up a positive attitude when things are bad, people will be drawn to you.

Here are some tips for you to help you develop your own positive attitude.

First, develop the skill of self serving illusions. When suffering from negativity, think about something good that has happened to you recently in a similar situation. Chances are, you were able to solve it. Get good at drawing on these success stories in your mind. We all need to remember these little jolts of optimism and positive energy. The more you do it, the better you will get at it.

Next, realize you can control your thoughts. Most of the negative people you encounter choose to be that way. I have never seen a birth announcement that says Mary and Bill Jones had a beautiful, but negative, baby daughter last night at 10:52 pm. We learn negativity, and it can be unlearned. Distract yourself from it, think about other things, and move on. Don’t dwell on it. After all, ’stinkin thinkin’ decreases your creativity (scientifically proven!) and hampers your ability to solve the issue. Like my friend Roger Larson used to say, “the more you stir it, the more it stinks.”

Lastly, positive people know most setbacks can be attributed to external causes which can be challenged, fixed or changed, not them. Negative people tend to think these are self afflicted, deserved, and permanent wounds.

I understand becoming positive is a life changing process for people, and it is not quite as easy as this. There are books and books about this subject.

But again, no left turns. Some times the solutions are easier than you think.

Set a goal for yourself. A simple goal—try to be positive for 30 days. Think about it and act upon it. Nothing can be more worthwhile. Can you imagine how powerful this one little change might make in YOUR life?

“In everyone’s life, at some time, our inner fire goes out. It is then burst into flame by an encounter with another human being. We should all be thankful for those people who rekindle the inner spirit.” [Albert Schweitzer]

Number 2. Be Engaged, Passionate >>